Developing Humility and a Positive Attitude

Developing Humility And A Positive Attitude

I am what I think! Solomon tells us, “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” (Proverbs 23:7) Our thoughts control our actions. Our thinking results from a lifetime of experience. Basic attitudes are shaped during childhood. Faulty parenting results in faulty thinking. A child will develop his or her self-image over a period of time. By the age of six the self-image will have been pretty well established in the mind of the child. Children from well functioning homes normally develop a healthy self-image and a high level of self esteem. Unfortunately, children from dysfunctional or abusive homes, or who have received faulty parenting will develop a poor self-image which always includes low self-esteem. Our level of self-esteem determines our attitudes which in turn determine our actions when faced with difficult situations.

Nevertheless, we are capable of changing the way we think. The apostle Paul says, “...casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ.” (II Corinthians 10:5) This passage assures us the mind is capable of being trained. Humility and a positive outlook are learned processes. Some students develop one or both of these attitudes at a young age. However, many of us have to work very hard to develop them as a part of learning “Every State Contentment.”

Our perception is our reality. It is not necessary for something to be true to be believed. If we perceive something in a given manner, our response to the situation will be determined by our perception. Accurate perception is essential to removing emotional pain. One of the skills we will be learning is accurate thinking. It is important that our perception of events be determined by accurate thinking. A distorted perception of events will always lead to misunderstandings and emotional pain. Solomon tells us “By humility and the fear of the Lord are riches, and honor and life.” (Proverbs 22:4) Being a humble person who tends to look for the positive aspect in all things is a must for removing emotional pain.

Humility is best defined as putting the needs of others ahead of our wants. Needs are those things necessary for satisfying our areas of human endeavor. Wants, on the other hand, satisfy our desires. It is always important to strive to place the needs of others above our wants.

The first step in accomplishing this is to get rid of the “Me” factor. Paul says, “For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith. (Romans 12:3) It is only human to want to consider things from our viewpoint. Humility, however, requires understanding the other person’s point of view as well. To the above

Paul adds, “Walk worthy of the calling with which you were called, with all lowliness and gentleness, with longsuffering, bearing with one another in love, endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” (Ephesians 4:1-3)

Humility is not a weakness, but a strength. Jesus tells us “Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles him self will be exalted.” (Matthew 23:12) The most humble person to ever walk this earth was Jesus Christ. The most powerful person to ever walk this earth was Jesus Christ. The humble person will elicit a more favorable response than the aggressive person, every time. Solomon tells us, “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” (Proverbs 15:1) Humility requires understanding the other person’s point of view and elevating our thinking to consider the whole picture.

Humility requires learning to forgive. None of us are perfect and we all sin and fall short. It is always tempting to hold another responsible when we are hurt and all to often we are unable to turn loose of a past inconsiderate or selfish word or action. Nevertheless, it is important to understand that a grudge only hurts the one carrying it. Forgiveness removes emotional pain. This is why we are told, “The discretion of man makes him slow to anger, and his glory is to overlook a transgression.” (Proverbs 19:11)

A positive attitude can be defined as always looking for the best in every person and situation. It is a fact of human nature that we always find what we are looking for. In any given situation and person there is always good and bad. We choose which we want to focus on. The person with a positive outlook will always focus on blessings rather than problems. Solomon tells us, “The blessing of the Lord makes one rich, and He adds no sorrow with it. (Proverbs 10:22)

Each of us is composed of three selves. Our public self is the self we present to the world. Our private self is the self our family and close friends know. Our personal or inner self is the self that only we and God know and it is the self which will stand before Him in judgment. Our inner self is the seat of all our feelings including our outlook, self-image and attitudes. This is why Paul prayed, “That He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through His Spirit in the inner man.” (Ephesians 3:16)

“Poor Me” thinking is always a formula for failure and must be eliminated. A poor me attitude always concentrates on self, always prevents accurate perception,and always consist of negative thinking. Our Mind is constantly thinking. If we have time to dwell on the negative, we have time to dwell on the positive. Learning to replace negative thoughts with positive ones is a must in mastering the ability to remove emotional pain. Paul understood this when he wrote, “Finally brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy - think on these things” (Philippians 4:8)

Some students attempt to process emotional pain without first developing these two attitudes. This has never been known to succeed. It is these two attitudes that make it possible for the skills in the next lesson to remove our emotional pain.